Homie Lover Friend

Can two people of the opposite sex have a strictly platonic relationship? This topic is always a very interesting one. I find that men tend to disagree more so than women that men and women cannot have a friendship without there being some form of interest by one of two parties involved. And let one of the two or both be attractive….then the chances of the friendship being platonic are really slim to nil, in their eyes. This tends to come up a lot for me due to the fact my best friend is a male. Even when we first met and weren’t even at the best friend status yet, our friendship always seemed to raise eyebrows. We never dated, attempted to date, kissed, or anything of that nature but because other people declared us to be good looking people they automatically assume their is more to our relationship than what we let on. I always find it very amusing and just comical that others put so much concern into our friendship even after we both say its nothing more to it. Unfortunately, my BFF has had a harder time with this than me. I haven’t been in very many relationship and the few that I have been in wouldn’t really say a whole lot and just kinda approach it with a we shall see type of thing. I remember one guy in particular who emphatically did not believe we had a strictly platonic friendship. He went as far as to ask me if we had sex together and when I said “No,” he proceeded to basically say there is no way that he isn’t at least attracted to you therefore not making out friendship platonic. I also tend to hear from guys a lot that they don’t want their significant other to have a male best friend, as if you have control over that.

Now, B’s experiences have been a little different. Once his past girlfriends or women he is just simply dating catches wind of me, he is typically bombarded with inquisitive questions wanting to know the history of our relationship. Some even going as far as to as if we love one another. Ummm, is that a trick question? All I could do was laugh. And then once they see a picture of me and have a face to put with the name, oh my Jesus, then all types of insecurities are exposed. With me being single almost my entire adult life I haven’t had to deal with this too much but I do wonder what kind of issues it might impose once I do begin to date again and develop a serious relationship. Now, I do believe that two people of the opposite sex can in fact be friends. It is very rare, to find this type of friendship for whatever reason. Often times too I find that men don’t believe this type of relationship can exist their close female friend is usually someone that they slept with. Even if she isn’t his best friend, because of his past or current actions, he cant believe that this type of friendship can exist.

I personally believe that when two people take their time in getting to know one another and allowing that trust and bond to grow then their wouldn’t be an issue. Now, on the other hand, cant no new people be poppin’ up that ain’t been there before and all of a sudden ya’ll best friends. Miss me with the bull@!%$. I like having a friend of the opposite that I can hang with, chill with, talk to, etc without there being any form of sexual tension and/or having to worry about going to the “next level.” Why is it often times expected that when you get along well with someone like a BFF that it only makes sense to date? Then things get awkward and the friendship isn’t quite the same. Well that’s too much complication for me and I say “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.”

I’ve even seen the memes on facebook and instagram where the two people getting down with the get down and the caption reads “We just friends.”  What do you guys think? Do you think there is a such thing as a strictly platonic friendship with two people of the opposite sex?

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